Tuesday, 4 August 2015

Chronic Dissatisfaction: People Are Never Happy

"Dissatisfaction is the shadow of ambition ",he said Henry H. Haskins decades ago. And the truth is that I was not wrong. In today's society, we are witnessing the exception of this phenomenon, 

which manifests as never before. In fact, personal and job dissatisfaction has virtually become a chronic disease. Why?
Chronic Dissatisfaction: People Are Never Happy

A society that produces chronic dissatisfied

Part of the responsibility for the high fees of dissatisfaction that we have achieved rests with society. In fact, daily newspapers and news we are bombarded with news of the teenager who became a millionaire thanks to a mobile application, the artist who became a star through your YouTube channel or young player who has been signed by a great team and now has a multimillion dollar contract. However, with this news also featured headlines that highlight the ravages of the crisis, unemployment and injustice.

So, we live in an age in which, in theory, anything is possible. However, in practice, only a small minority manages to achieve those dreams. So large that contrast between the almost infinite possibilities and an anonymous reality can generate a deep sense of dissatisfaction. When the person compared their results with those of others and not feel proud of what it has achieved, often sit home dissatisfaction. 

Obviously, chronic dissatisfaction is not just a social but also personal phenomenon. In fact, there are people who could be classified as "permanent dissatisfied". These people are not able to rejoice in what they have accomplished and continue to think of the road that still lies ahead, focus on what you have, rather than what they have, and why nothing satisfies them.

It is curious because its ultimate goal is the satisfaction but at the same time, this becomes an increasingly elusive chimera that is further away. Therefore, these people increasingly ambitious goals are set, hoping that when met, can finally be satisfied.

However, what happens is that these people do not seek personal satisfaction but the approval and appreciation of others. Chronic dissatisfaction really are built upon a deep insecurity. Thus, these people spend much of their lives feeling jealous, bitter and experiencing a sense of inadequacy. They believe that life is unfair and minimize their accomplishments and are even convinced that failed, though not well.

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The two faces of dissatisfaction

Dissatisfaction is one of the motors driving behaviour. In fact, Oscar Wilde said, " dissatisfaction is the first step in the progress of man . " 

Dissatisfaction is a signal indicates that something is wrong, we are following guidelines erroneous references and wrong, or that we are involved in a dysfunctional relationship. In any case, we warn us that we must change something, in order to achieve a state of greater fullness.

From this perspective, dissatisfaction is not negative, quite the contrary, it encourages us to change and improve.Impels us to turn our resources to redirect our steps. 

However, chronic dissatisfaction is negative as we plunged into a state of permanent displeasure, prevents us to focus and live fully the present because we feel we are not integrated, we are not satisfied with our being, we not fully accept our identity. 

Chronic dissatisfaction involves a split between our "I" ideal and the person we are. Obviously, if we do not accept, nor can we become happy.

How to rid the state of chronic dissatisfaction?

1. Distinguish the desire of necessity- Our company not only drives us to consumerism but also wants us to believe that satisfaction and happiness come from our possessions. Thus, we tends a deadly trap that forces us to constantly run after things that do not need. So next time you feel unhappy, just ask yourself if you really need or you're just experiencing a wish. 

2. Take a look back- From time to time, you should look back to remember how far we have traveled. Sometimes when we are too focused on the goal, we forget how much we have achieved and what sacrifices we have made ​​to reach the point where we are. Remember that sometimes it is not so important what you have achieved but the person that you've made ​​along the way, the effort you made. You probably have more reasons to feel satisfied than you imagine.

3. Look around you- It is true that each person is unique and that compared to the other does not make much sense but the chronically dissatisfied have a limited view of reality that always compare their achievements with other majors.This narrow perspective leads them to feel inferior and dissatisfied because, in their eyes, there is always someone more successful. Therefore, it is also advisable to look in another direction. So we can realizing how lucky we have been and be grateful for what we have. 

4. Focus your efforts- A Latin proverb says:Who pursues two hares, does not hunt any. Often chronically dissatisfied are involved in a series of overly ambitious projects that steal your strength and energy, condemning in advance to failure. But many targets usually indicates that the person does not know for sure what he wants from life and has not discovered what really satisfies. Therefore, an essential step away from the perennial dissatisfaction is to know, to know what makes us really happy and to focus on it.

5. Embrace the essential- We are blinded by the amount of possibilities, as well as the countless items and activities, so that we always want more. We have developed a kind of "nervous hunger" that we can not meet. So occasionally it is important to return to basics, embrace the peace and moments of absolute relaxation. To achieve a more fulfilling life is important to learn to detect the superficial and focus only on the essentials.
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